Category Archives: Children

Reduce Reuse Recycle Resist

FullSizeRender-6Earth Day 2017                                                                                                             ©donnaesgro

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Treat the earth well

It was not given to you by your parents

It was loaned to you by your children

We do not inherit the Earth from our ancestors

We borrow it from our children.

Ancient Indian Proverb

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Earth Day 2017 took on greater meaning than ever before. Since Trump took office his administration has systematically undermined and dismissed scientific facts such as global warming as liberal hysteria.

In a mere 100 days he and Congress have implemented unprecedented easing of environmental protections beginning with the Orwellian act of excising all mention of climate change from the White House website. This draconian editing process was followed by the appointment of the fossil fuel shill, Scott Pruitt, to head the Environmental Protection Agency.

Pruitt, outspoken in his opposition to the very values that the agency upholds, has stated that “carbon dioxide is not a primary contributor to climate change.”  He sued the EPA for supporting President Obama’s Clean Power Act – an important piece of legislation that for the first time set Federal limits on carbon pollution. Pruitt is a man who Trump praises highly, stating that his new head of the EPA “will reverse an out-of-control anti-energy agenda.”

Appointing Scott Pruitt to head the EPA is akin to placing someone who believes that the earth is the center of the universe to head NASA. We will not let the current GOP lead our nation down a perilous path with their “Roadmap to Repeal” (An actual document compiled by The Freedom Partners – a group of wealthy political donors organized by the Koch brothers).

Scientists are accustomed to thinking of things in terms of hundreds of thousands of years (or light years). But, as seen by the massive worldwide turn out for the Science March on Earth Day, the boundary between politics and science is now an illusion.

When Trump repeals environmental safeguards such as the Clean Water Act, which protected the fragile eco-system of our streams and rivers from becoming dumping grounds for toxic waste, and when agencies such as NOAA (National Oceanic Atmospheric Administration) are being treated dismissively as extraneous, scientists have been forced to become activists.

Trump’s careless tweets, his mendacity, his toying with the grave issues of global warming and nuclear war, reveal the vulnerability of our dreams for our children and the world they will inherit. Dreams that are worth fighting for – that have always been worth fighting for…a world that is cleaner, safer, more compassionate, with liberty and justice for all.

Gather your friends and family and lace up your boots. We have seen in the last 100 days that our voices are powerful. We are all connected, just as all waterways are connected as they flow to the sea. Hear the call to action. There is no time to lose.

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“What used to be a wish list of the oil, coal, and gas industries has become the to do list for Congress and the White House.”

Michael Brune – Executive Director-Sierra Club

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ttwP02WXB0I

https://twitter.com/@stoneinthepond

Fight Like A Girl

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©Pee Wee Pumps

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“Bless the beasts and singing birds and  guard with tenderness small things that have no words.”  Anonymous

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As a baby girl grows, she not only listens to her inner voice to determine who she is, but to all the voices with which her culture speaks to her. It is critical that those who love her help her to believe that she is strong, smart, and valued for her unique and singular identity.

The photograph above is from the Pee Wee Pumps website which sells infant safe high heels sized 0-6 months. (This tiny model is wearing “Diva” – a Black satin high heel crib shoe  offered at $53.99 a pair. Other baby stiletto choices include Sassy, Swanky, Glamorous, and Wild Child.)

I cannot imagine, when so many women around the world are fighting and dying for their rights, the right to control their own bodies, the right to be educated, the right to be treated with the same respect as the men in their society, and the right not to live in subordinate fear, why anyone would think it was cute to dress a baby girl up in faux high heels. Putting an infant in this ridiculous outfit is objectification at its lowest form, because it is perpetuated on an innocent before she has any cognitive association to the meaning, uses, and symbolism of the product.

A parent’s eyes are the child’s first mirror. When parents encourage their little girls to conform to stereotypes they help create at deep emotional and intellectual levels feelings that lower self-expectations and self-esteem. In The Second Sex, Simone de Beauvoir postulates that “sooner or later women will arrive at complete economic and social equality, which will bring about an inner metamorphosis.” It is respect for this fragile inner metamorphosis that is necessary in order to achieve independent, self-assured, and confident young girls.

No discussion about creating this kind of societal psychological shift is complete without mention of the stereotyping of boys. One does not exist without the other. It is just as harmful to tell a little boy that he is allowed to get angry and fight back, but it is not “manly” to cry, as it is to condone a little girl’s tears while telling her that girls don’t fight.

From Disney to Darkest Dungeons traditional gender stereotypes are constantly perpetuated in the media and in the marketing of “girl” and” boy” products.

Males are: Competitive, assertive, athletic, competent, strong, tough, aggressive, dominant, and stoic.

Females are: Emotional, romantic, sensitive, frail, passive, tentative, submissive, naïve, and seductive.

These roles, seen over and over as the child grows, normalize character traits based on gender and project unrealistic goals, from female body image to macho posturing. When someone speaks for us, we lose our voice. Boys are in danger of becoming emotionally isolated and girls lost in the never satiated need for approval.

How does a parent fight this cultural vortex and its strong emotional, social, and economic current? Believing in gender equality is all very well and good but we need to act on our beliefs in a conscious way. The most important way we teach our children is through modeling behaviors. Reject stereotypes as they arise and talk about it with your children. You will be surprised at how aware they are. Even two and three year olds will tell you that fuchsia is a girl color. Don’t just accept that. You don’t have to force your little boy to buy a fuchsia backpack, but you can ask your child why he thinks fuchsia is only for girls and point out all the amazing fuchsia colors in nature explaining that a color is just a color. Gently plant the seed and trust in your child’s innocent clarity. It is we that muddy this clarity with our pinks and blues.

Stereotyping is a kind of prejudice that leads to sexism in our personal and public lives. We are male and female, of course, and that is a wondrous thing. But, first, we are human beings born with a keen desire for pride and dignity and an innate need to dream and explore without limits.

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©LewisHine

https://twitter.com/@stoneinthepond

Art is Not a Luxury

 

art-therapyArt work by Suha Wanous, a Syrian refugee child

Conservative estimates are that 10,000 children have died from the Syrian War. Art therapy programs have helped to heal the survivors who have wounds that can’t be seen.

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“You don’t have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them.”              

 Ray Bradbury

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Last week Trump released his budget proposal in which federal funding for the renowned Corporation for Public Broadcasting is cut to zero and the highly respected Institutions of the National Endowment for the Arts and the National Endowment for the Humanities are eliminated completely. If Congress concurs, this will be the first time in American history that a president has pulled the federal arts program from the people.

In support of these cuts, Trump’s administration has stated, “ Can we really continue to ask a coal miner in West Virginia or a single mom in Detroit to pay for these programs? The answer is no. We can ask them to pay for defense, and we will. But we can’t ask them to continue to pay for the Corporation for Public Broadcasting.”

CPB, NEA, and NEH combined cost the average citizen about $1.35 per year

Our country deserves better and our citizens deserve more respect. Trump clearly disregards the intelligence of those who struggle and the dreams they have for their children’s future by dismissing such illuminating shows as Sesame Street, Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood, Masterpiece Theater, American Masters, Independent Lens, Live From Lincoln Center, Front Line, PBS News Hour, Ken Burns, NATURE, Bill Moyers, NOVA, PBS Kids and PBS America as unnecessary excesses produced by and for the elite.

Particularly in a country in which preschool is not available to all, and many local libraries have been shut down because of the cost of maintaining them, public television and radio are some of the only free inlets of unbiased information, objective journalism, and commercial free educational programing. It is no surprise then, that the same president who “loves the poorly educated” and considers journalists “the enemy” would not believe in funding universal access to knowledge. Public Broadcasting may be the only window on the world that impoverished children are exposed to. Ask yourself why looking through that window is not something that our current president wants them to do.

Art, in all its forms, is an expression of our shared humanity. We still gaze in wonder at ancient works, identifying with the emotions and thoughts of people that lived centuries ago. Art, then, connects us, not only as a viable expression of modern culture, but across the ages and around the world. It encourages us to think, to feel, to see other points of view, to be exposed to the lessons of history, and to learn about other cultures. Art tears down walls and builds bridges. It seeks out the truth and it helps us heal. It is for all of us, from the preschooler’s first self portrait to Leonardo da Vinci’s Mona Lisa. Trump’s plan clearly reveals his vision of a dystopian future in which the arts not only hold no value, but are dismissed as irrelevant.  Universal access to the arts and support of artists is a sacrosanct principle that we cannot let slip away.

One of my personal heroes, Fred Rogers, makes a plea for federal funding for children’s programming – May 1, 1969

https://youtu.be/fKy7ljRr0AA

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The Vital Importance of Diversity

IMG_5777©donnaesgro

“The colors of the rainbow so pretty in the sky

Are also on the faces of people going by.”

What a Wonderful World – Thiele & Weiss

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If we care about mankind and its future, if we care that the most powerful nation on earth has a leader who does not believe in science and who puts immediate gratification above concern for future generations, then it is time that we make a radical shift in how we view education within a global society. The mill of school grinds along, and we are glad that it does, but changes in how we teach at the fundamental level have now become critically important.

“Most of what we teach children today is going to be completely irrelevant to the job market in 2040 or 2050.”

Yuval Noah Harari – Sapiens

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 We cannot survive, much less thrive, if we build walls and keep people out. It is through the permeable sharing of ideas and cultural nuances that we build on our own reservoirs of knowledge, compassion, and the ability to live in harmony.

No one would dispute that teaching our children to share is a good thing, one of the basic elements of social-emotional relationships. When we share, we learn. We show others our good intentions, and they show us theirs. Bridges are built and alliances are formed.

The concept of respecting one another begins at the earliest levels of education. Even preschoolers can understand that their blue marble of a world spins in a beautifully complex solar system. They can grasp the idea that there are lands across the seas where people speak differently and go about their day in different ways, yet share the same joys and sorrows that we do.

We cannot coexist in any kind of peace if we fear each other, and we cannot imagine anything better if we don’t begin to encourage critical thinking skills and the uses of imagination in our schools.

Children feel a close affinity with the creatures of air, sea, mountains, and forests that share the world with us. Have you, lately, looked at a picture book of animals as closely as they do? They have an innate curiosity and empathy that, rather than dismissing as ingenuous, we need to recognize for the wisdom that it holds.

The question “Why?” is asked primarily by children less than seven years old and the greatest philosophers and scientists of all time. Think about that.

Yet we proceed, beginning in elementary school, to encourage students not to ask,  but to answer questions- to memorize facts, figures, and formulas. It is no wonder, then, that the trajectory of education becomes a long distance race to get into a good college, secure a high paying job, and then, finally, get down to the business of living.

The way our competitive education system works is that children learn early on that it is better not to think outside of the box. That imaginative thinking, flights of fancy, and creativity, at best lowers their grade point average and at worse, gets them labeled “weird.”

We are, grade by grade, inadvertently teaching our children not to think more deeply than a test requires.

Worldwide-scholars, tech companies, scientists, educators, politicians, medical researchers, and thousands of others share knowledge; effectively creating networks of ideas that often lead to radical breakthroughs in their fields. When we think and feel and work together at the global level, we nurture compassion for the hungry, the suffering, the refugees of war, all those in need, because the faces and the voices of humanity become real to us. We cannot understand others without interacting with them, any more than we can understand what water is just from knowing its chemical formula. When we  foster bonds with different nations we all benefit. Our minds expand in many different ways as we share thoughts and our hearts grow in equal measure as we become more viscerally aware of others.

Without making a definitive change in both our education system and our budding nationalistic and isolationist politics we are in serious danger of losing our ability to engage innovatively and diplomatically. It is unwise, if not foolish, to be unaware that our entire planet is an eco-system, not only from the standpoint of biology, but on deeper levels of cognitive connectivity. We need clean air and water and we need to believe in and take responsibility for climate change, but we must also believe in mutual respect and tolerance despite different skin colors, religions, or ideologies. It is vital that we begin to teach, starting at the earliest levels of education, that we are the caretakers of our world, not its rulers.

 

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2017/mar/09/epa-scott-pruitt-carbon-dioxide-global-warming-climate-change

Resist

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“A machine that, when you touch the button, it makes the ocean clean for the whales and dolphins and even the sharks.”  Ava – Age 6

https://twitter.com/@stoneinthepond

Dr. Seuss – Zen Master

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“So please, when you step, step with care and great tact.

And Remember that Life’s a great balancing act.”

Oh! The Places You’ll Go!  –  Dr. Seuss

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Read across American month began this week with celebrations all over the world of Dr. Seuss’ birthday. Dr. Seuss would be delightful to read even if his books were just pure fun. But, there is more than silliness under that tall striped hat.

In The Uses of Imagination, Bruno Bettelheim states that “The child intuitively comprehends that although fairy tales are unreal, they are not untrue.”

This is the nexus of the genius of Dr. Seuss – His ability to create whimsical characters with wild hair, gangly bodies, and furry feet that touch our heart with their humanity.

Dr. Seuss, born Theodore Seuss Geisel (1904), was an artist, an intellectual and a seeker of knowledge. His very first children’s book  And To Think That I Saw It On Mulberry Street (rejected twenty seven times by publishers) encourages using one’s imagination as a way to see the world in many different ways. He poses the question: What is reality?

But Mulberry Street didn’t sell well and his career as a children’s author seemed doomed when Life Magazine published an article in 1954 that exposed America’s children’s poor reading abilities. John Hersey (author of A Separate Peace) was quoted in the article as saying that children were illiterate because the primers in school were so boring and that authors like Dr. Seuss should be writing them.

Shortly after, Theo was approached by a major publishing house and asked to create a primer using 220 vocabulary words. The result , The Cat in the Hat, made him a household name. Fame brought lucrative offers by corporations eager to exploit his popularity. The ever unconventional Geisel turned down every proposal. Even when he was wooed with an unprecedented amount of money just to use a short unpublished verse on a Christmas billboard, Theo, showing unusual moral fortitude, refused, stating that he did not want to be associated with products for sale.

Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before!

What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store

What if Christmas…perhaps…means a little bit more!

 

And what happened then? Well…in Whoville they say,

That the Grinch’s small heart grew three sizes that day!

How The Grinch Stole Christmas – Dr. Seuss

Throughout his career as a children’s author, Dr. Seuss emphasized the importance of integrity, caring, tenderness, courage, and the interconnectivity of all creatures.

He held his head high and he threw out his chest

And he looked at the hunters as much as to say

“Shoot if you must but I won’t run away.”

I meant what I said and I said what I meant…

An elephant’s faithful One Hundred percent!

 Horton Hatches the Egg – Dr. Seuss

 

In The Sneetches he addresses the absurdity of prejudice, and in Oh! The Places You’ll Go! he gives us, in classic Seussesque style, both warning and encouragement:

You’ll come to a place where the streets are not marked. Some windows are lighted. But mostly there darked.

But Dr. Seuss reaches a lofty zenith in his darkly beautiful and profoundly environmentally aware treatise The Lorax, who “speaks for the trees.” The author’s brilliance lies in his ability to show us a believable glimpse of a tree’s soul – albeit one with a small orange furry body and a ridiculously large yellow moustache.

Teach your children to be on the look out for them.

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“When I let go of what I am I become what I might be. When I let go of what I have, I receive what I need.” Tao Te Ching

 

“If things start happening, don’t worry, don’t stew. Just go right along

and you’ll start happening, too.” Dr. Seuss

 

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Where Environmentalism Begins

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Clockwise:  Michael, Donna, and Laura Esgro                                                    ©donnaesgro

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Do we want our children to care about protecting the planet earth? Then, we must make sure that they are in awe of its myriad wonders. It can be as simple as taking your child outside to star gaze – as singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. This humble song has raised children’s awareness of the preciousness of the night sky more than all the warnings of what pollution is doing to the visibility of the heavens…because it is about love. It is about loving the stars, especially one little star among all the rest. This is how we learn compassion. Children look to us for guidance in all things, small and in this case infinite. To tell a child who has never pondered a sparkling sky that if we don’t reuse and recycle we will one day be unable to see the stars has no meaning. To tell a child who has no knowledge of sea horses, of anemones or tide pools, who has never heard the songs of dolphins and whales that we are poisoning our oceans, is an empty threat that cannot be understood with the senses and so, will have no meaning.

We can site statistics about the vital importance of preserving our forests, but can a child understand why? Not unless the joy of trees is in his consciousness-until he has climbed onto a fragrant low hanging branch, watched a bird arduously building its nest, or day dreamed in the dappled light of a leafy dome will he understand viscerally the vital link between a tree and himself. A tree might as well be playground equipment if there is no emotional or spiritual connection.

It is difficult for young children to think abstractly. This is why stories, either from books or experience, “Your grandmother was a brave gypsy who wore scarves threaded with gold…” resonate in ways that facts never can. I know that I love the ocean because my mother swam in it all the while I was in her womb.

Sometimes knowledge is first hand, tiny fingers touching a spiny sea star, but often it cannot be. This is where books can fill the gap -opening up the awareness that is necessary in order for a child to treasure his environment.

As a young girl I read The Secret Garden over and over. Oh, how I longed for a garden of my own! A place where I could grow vines of snap peas and pick flowers to wear in my hair. Books like this helped shaped my image of who I was and who I aspired to be.

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Over 100 million marine animals are killed each year due to plastic debris.

How does a child understand the dire weight of this information? Does she know about the majestic sea turtles who eat plastic bags thinking that they are jelly fish and die? To be told that it is a good idea to reuse shopping bags is one thing, but to be aware of the plight of the sea turtle is an other.

Silent Killers – YouTube

We can hear about natural disasters, floods, famines, but finally, it is the faces of the victims that make us understand the depths of their suffering. Our hearts must ache with sorrow or joy before our heads can understand. So, go outside with your child often and show reverence for all living things. Read books that celebrate the exquisite magic of our fragile planet.

“Everything you can imagine is real.” Picasso

Imagine a world that works as one to save itself, from global warming to the horrors of war. Imagine clean oceans and skies, respect for all creatures, and the power of love. Show your children the glory of this blue marble cast into the infinite that we are blessed to inhabit. Plant a sunflower, build a sand castle, listen for crickets on a summer evening, look for spider webs after a rain… Show them your joy in the bounteous gifts that surround us, and you will inspire them to care.

 

 

Learning to Listen

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copyright©donnaesgro

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A child must learn to listen before he can listen to learn. Experts agree that the conditions which most affect  literacy take place in the home, long before a child enters school. Children listen, understand, and speak before they read, write, and spell. Without the former, the latter is impossible. It follows that the more developed a very young child’s language skills, the easier time he will have learning the academics of literacy. Reading to your child from the very beginning will help develop listening skills that are invaluable later in life. At first your active baby won’t have the attention span to allow you to read all the words of a book to her, but just sitting together enjoying books, talking about the illustrations, is enough to start. As time goes by, a young child who has access to a bookshelf will soon be seeking out books and sitting quietly pretending to read. This activity is not, simply, adorable. For a child, the act of pretending is a major step in learning a new skill.

In order to help a child learn to listen, keep the home environment as free of unnecessary distraction as possible. Turn off the background noise. This simple act will help to create a more peaceful atmosphere conducive to contemplation…and to reading. Music is not usually a distraction, but the news and commercials that accompany radio and television certainly are. Children are sensitive and their hearing is acute, try to shield them from the constant advertising and, more importantly, the disturbing violent events that are, sadly, so often in the news.

Another aspect in teaching children to learn to listen is to listen to them! The respect that you show when you pay careful attention to a child’s stories and questions teaches him the importance of listening. Ask interactive, open-ended questions that offer the child not only an opportunity to express himself but to develop cognitive skills. Avoid “baby talk” or talking down to a child. Children love “big” words; adults often underestimate their insatiable curiosity and innate ability to learn them. Books add a multitude of new words not used in daily life that enrich and enlarge your child’s vocabulary exponentially. The art of thoughtful listening is fast becoming obsolete. Help your child become attentive in a culture rife with sound bites, twitter, and the abbreviated language of texting. It is only in listening closely that we truly learn.

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To teach is to share knowledge joyfully; to learn is to listen with equal joy.  Teachers are all around us: